Whitney and Jeremy

While watching what seemed to be the unending coverage of Whitney Houston’s death last week I was taken by a simple thought articulated by Dr. Drew Pinsky on CNN. He lamented that he was interviewed too many times after the predictable demise of a celebrity who had a history of drug and alcohol abuse. He listed some of the recent ones; Brittany Murphy, Michael Jackson, Amy Winehouse and Heath Ledger among others and he stated emphatically that if those around the stars continue to enable them, we would be seeing more of these tragedies in the future.

The pressure of wealth and fame is difficult for anyone especially on the young. I remember quite vividly as a young Wall Street broker having colleagues, almost always guys in their 20’s, who were in and out of rehab after snorting their earnings up their noses. A quick rise can often lead to stress and anxiety, which then can lead to abuse of drugs and alcohol and disaster on a career. When it happens to someone whose talents give us so much pleasure and enjoyment and who seemingly have everything, we are saddened but unfortunately, not at all shocked.

Contrast that with the other celebrity story, which is all the rage now, that of Jeremy Lin, the Harvard educated, Asian American, point guard for the New York Knicks. His rise came from nowhere, catching everyone including his coach by surprise. If not for the injury to one player and a death in the family of another, Jeremy Lin just might still be warming the Knicks bench. Instead, we have a kid who had a dream to play in the NBA, stuck with it and when his shot came he rose to the occasion.

Lin’s story intrigued us for so many reasons; not too many Ivy Leaguers in professional sports, certainly not too many Asian Americans and though not as uncommon, not too many outwardly religious athletes as well. All of that combined with the fact that he came off the bench when his team was doing horribly and lifted them to a level that brought on a seven game winning streak, winning eight of nine games (as of this being written), one of them against the defending world champions. Lin’s modesty and sincere devotion to God is refreshing as much as it is uncommon these days.

We can hope and even assume that Jeremy Lin will handle his new celebrity well and will remain grounded. But we live in a society that lifts people up rapidly, yet drops them just as quickly when their talent wanes or their story is not as intriguing anymore. The first time we heard Whitney Houston’s voice we were seduced by the beauty and range. She became a national icon when in the middle of the first Gulf War she gave us a rendition of the Star Spangled Banner at the Super Bowl that will never be matched, for those few amazing moments we were all patriots united by her voice, confirming to us mere mortals that there was no height America could not reach. Yet Whitney Houston the fragile human being lost some of the range and her star was not as bright. Who knows if that was the main motive for her reliance on prescription drugs, alcohol and other substances?

One thing we can all be sure of — at some point the story of Jeremy Lin will abate too. I hope it lasts for a long time, it really is a great story, but at some point his career will end and what made him endearing to so many will no longer be applicable. Therein lies the message of these two great talents. Nothing lasts forever; people have to be prepared for success and ultimately for decline. More importantly people have to deal with the hand they’re dealt. The real test of heroism is not how the adulation is handled but how when the crowds are gone life can still be normal, even in a new reality. Let’s pray for the end of lives wasted by addiction and for ascent of a few more Jeremy Lins.

Sorry for Burning Your Books, While You Burn Your Own People

I wonder if it is just me or perhaps that I am jaded by living in a sort of ethnic bubble, but I find the bend over backwards apologies to the Afghan people for the inadvertent burning of the Koran to be a new low. As a Jew and an American I am appalled at the desecration of religious symbols and objects, a keen reminder that the Nazis first push against the Jews was to burn their books. I was disappointed at the American soldiers immature act of urinating on the bodies of Taliban fighters. However, a little perspective please. The animals that call themselves the Taliban destroyed a thousands year old Buddhist shrine when they took over Afghanistan in the late 90's. They behead people, oppress women and tolerate no other religion. This band of sub-human scum infect the earth with hatred and have no tolerance for other religions, heck other versions of Islam other than their own.

Let's take it a step further, how many Koran's were burned in the government shelling of civilian homes in Homs Syria? Where is the outrage and where is the anger? More importantly, where is the Arab League and Muslim religious leaders? Why are they waiting for the world to act? Do they not have armies? Do they not have the ability to clean up their own mess? No, they wait for the West to intervene so that when Assad or the Taliban are defeated they can go back to fighting their old nemesis, the people that came to save them in the first place, us.

The so called Arab Spring, something welcomed with optimism at first is nothing other than an Islamist takeover of Arab countries. Egypt is proving that a treaty is not worth the paper it is printed on and it's detention of Americans from NGO's a sign that they will tolerate no dissent. Time for us to step out of the way and let these animals do to themselves what they do best, kill each other.

If they want our help it should come with a price; democratically elected governments, freedom of press and speech and separation of religion and government. Otherwise, fix your own damned problems and enjoy your relations with Russia, Cuba and Venezuela, that should bring you from the stone age to at least the middle ages.

One last thing, before we apologize to the Muslims for a mistake, let's please demand that Christians in the Muslim countries be treated half as well as Muslims are treated in Christian countries. Christian are becoming extinct in the Middle East and if you are unaware of it just look up Coptic Christians in Egypt, yes that Egypt, moderate Egypt; they are destroying that once vibrant community and the world says nothing. Yet we apologize for the accidental burning of books, shame on us.

What we Can Learn from the NFL and the Giants

Football is by far the most popular spectator sport in America and some have argued that it has replaced baseball as “America’s game.” Football is a game that requires brute strength, speed, discipline and most importantly intelligence. I would argue that the intelligence required to play football far surpasses that of other sports. Most people, myself included, don’t know enough about the game to know when a linebacker is downfield covering a tight end or when a defense switches from a four-three to a three-four. What we do know and what makes us love the game is that eleven guys on one side are trying to move the ball forward and that eleven guys on the other side are trying to stop them. Strength and speed while vital to success is always trumped by discipline and intelligence.
Due to the nature of the sport, football can only be played once a week. My friend Bruce taught me an adage some years back that I try to live by; “four hours a week that’s all I ask.” Translation; “my team plays once a week for four hours honey, it’s the only time I want to myself, besides the season is only 16 weeks long and maybe just a little longer if we make the playoffs.” And so it’s been for 25 plus years. I still watch the occasional Yankee or Rangers game but not with the zeal I have for the Giants. Additionally, as the kids got older those four hours have been bonding experiences for us and something we often look forward to doing together.

Personally, I’m a horrible fan. I curse every play and call made, I second-guess the failures and credit luck for the successes. I’m never really satisfied. As a Giants fan, I never really warmed up to Tom Coughlin, I thought he always won enough games to just keep his job but would never be great. Even the victory in Super Bowl XLI was in my eyes more due to David Tyree than the coaching staff. Eli Manning looked like he was so lethargic as to make me nuts, and Coughlin always had this look of bewilderment after every penalty and missed play. What I didn’t appreciate and failed to understand was the sheer intelligence and the loyalty to discipline that both of them have which permeated to everyone on the team. It has made a good team great and it is a lesson we can all learn from (especially you Jets fans). It is also a metaphor for life.
Life, like football is complicated. Sometimes you need to be strong, other times you need to be smart but you always have to have discipline. You also have to stick to your game plan but be ready to make adjustments to it if things change. Most importantly, when your record indicates that you are at best mediocre but there is a small window open to take you to the next level, you never give up. The Giants are the first 9-7 team to win a Super Bowl. In the last two weeks of the season they were written off as dead and even after they managed to make the playoffs after two straight wins no one thought they would win three road games especially the one against Green Bay. What we learned from them was that setbacks are just a catalyst to try harder and boy did they ever.
Imagine if each of us carried that message with us in our every day life, especially our leaders. We could achieve anything and overcome any problem. And there is something else we can learn from the NFL that doesn’t exist in some other professional sports: revenue sharing. The NFL might be a business, actually a multi billion dollar business but it’s run like a socialist one. It doesn’t make a difference if your team is in New York or Jacksonville you all make money and can only pay players under the same salary cap restrictions. Yet somehow despite this seemingly un-American business system, it works. Somehow too, we fans don’t begrudge football players the big contracts that we often lament in baseball or basketball. Because it works and because these guys for the most part are disciplined and intelligent.
This was a great moment for New York and a fun if nerve-wracking season for Giants fans. Most importantly the NFL, the New York Giants and the game of football showed the Americans and the rest of the world that we can do great things, even when the odds are against us.

Post Mortem

I have learned a lot about human nature as result of my involvement in the "Bina Affair." Self interest seemingly trumps the greater good and the burden of proof seems to rise proportionately with the prominence of the accused. There is a sliding scale on morality and different standards are set for those with financial muscle. It is a story as old as time and frankly with all of my life experience I don't know why it still depresses me. I am known to be cynical, this episode should have been no different, but in some ways I am naive, I hoped that by telling my story and using my name I could help right a wrong. Not just a wrong against me but against many others, I was mistaken and now I'm not sure if it was worth the effort.

For those of you who never experienced it, emotional whiplash is like being hit by a falling piano; even if you look up in time to see it coming and move out of the way, the scattering pieces will get you anyway. When Rabbi Bina did his work on me, I was only 16 but already a veteran in survival skills. What he said and did was hurtful but somehow I managed to move on. I spoke about my experience over time and admittedly I was never of a fan of the man, but I didn't bad mouth him either. When my nephew went to study under Rabbi Bina some 18 years after my episode I made sure to tell him that he should be aware of his tactics, I never told him not to go. Same is true for friends who chose to send their kids to his Yeshiva.

I am an unlikely character in this story and my part in it may have remained minor if it wasn't for the fact the Rabbi's tactics seems to have affected more than just a few other kids over the years. Seeing that quite a few others were telling similar stories to mine, some even more horrific, I chose to tell mine publicly and to use my name, a symptom of the whiplash I guess. I also thought that other victims would follow my lead and lend credibility to the accusations by using their names. Unfortunately, most of the others did not use their names making the story seem less credible; now it was one being told by sissies afraid of confronting their tormentor or just sour grapes by kids who didn't like Rabbi Bina's strictness. I am not blaming the victims here, but considering the push back I have received from the Rabbi's supporters I don't blame them for remaining anonymous.

Let me be clear, most of the feedback to me has been positive and supportive. Even contemporaries of mine who studied under Rabbi Bina around the time I did, who are still big fans of his today, have acknowledged the plausibility of my story and expressed sympathy to me. My classmates for the most part do remember the incident and are retroactively sympathetic. Therein lies my point about self interest. Rabbi Bina's system, quite successful in the eyes of many, relies on lifting certain, perhaps most students up, the downside is that it comes at the expense of others, perhaps even a small minority. It's still a type of survival of the fittest situation, where the stronger ones get the positive treatment, the invitations to the house for Shabbat, the adulation, the favoritism, the love. The rest have their bodies left on the side of the road for others to pick up and deal with. Ah, but to be the recipient of that positive reinforcement, how privileged one must feel when the bull in the china shop stops by your shelf and calmly licks your hand and lets you take a pleasant ride on his back. It's enough to make you thank God and turn you into a good Jew, one who will support your fearless Rabbi and look at his antics against the weak and unfortunate as collateral damage, the cost of doing business, the cost of being chosen.

To us, that minority that were swatted down like flies on hot and humid day it is hard to see how this rabbi is considered successful. It is not hard for us to see how his other students adore him, he buys their affection by delivering his venom to others. But we do wonder how the leadership of our community does not see the transparency of the tactic and the cost in emotional life to those affected. And please don't preach to me that Rabbi Bina is an acquired taste or not for everybody. Education ideally shows no discrimination; Jewish education certainly not. Those of us who could not hack Rabbi Bina's program deserved the decency of deciding that for ourselves or at minimum to be treated with basic dignity. That I believe, is a Torah value let alone a human one.

I for one forgive Rav Bina, not that he's ever asked for it, but I do not speak for the others, anonymous or not. For that Rabbi Bina will have to be aware that a sin committed "bayn adam l'chavero" (between man and man) even Yom Kippur "ayno michaper" (Yom Kipper does not forgive) unless he asks for it. We are taught that no man is without sin, even Moses, thus unless the rabbi has surpassed Moses in greatness we can assume that he is not without sin. Since I am skeptical that any inquiry or action will be done I can only hope that with the publicity will serve as a warning label to future applicants to his Yeshiva. In the end, I too need forgiveness from those I should have warned earlier. I hope all of you can find it in your hearts to forgive me and I hope too that Rabbi Bina forgives me too, my intention was to help the weak ones not to exact revenge against him. I pray he is as forgiving to me as I am to him.

The Right Time for Israel to Attack Iran

This past Sunday’s New York Times magazine ran a cover story about Israel and Iran. The story focused on a few key points in the ongoing saga of Iran’s attempt at making a nuclear bomb. First there is a disagreement between the intelligence community in Israel, which feels that Iran can be stopped through sabotage, assassinations and penetrating the supply chain to sell defective materiel to Iran and with Israel’s the military establishment that favors an offensive strike. Then there is the United States who prefers sanctions and avoiding all of the ramifications a military strike will cause. Finally, there is the debate within all the parties about the price Israel will pay for striking Iran, mostly through Iran’s agents Hezbollah and Hamas who have tens of thousands of rockets aimed at Israel.

Political will and military urgency will trump the intelligence community on this one I think. Besides, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu got rid of the last Mossad chief who did not prefer a military option so he’s indicated where his sentiments are and he has not been shy about promising the world that Iran will not get the bomb. But what to do about the United States and the 50,000 bombs that rain down on Israel after an Israeli attack on Iran?
The United States can be dealt with within a very short window. The Obama administration is simply against a strike, Obama’s statement in his State of the Union address that all options are on the table not withstanding. There is a segment of the U.S. population who are tired of war, sick of Afghanistan, fed up with Iraq who have no stomach for any more military operations, by us or an ally. An Israeli strike will be seen as having the acquiescence of the U.S. even if it doesn’t, thus making U.S. assets the target of counter attacks. They are Obama’s constituency, his base and he will not disappoint the base before an election. I don’t think there are many people out there that believe that if Obama is re-elected he will change his mind either.
All the Republican candidates except Ron Paul are in favor of a military strike against Iran by either Israel or the U.S. However, military and intelligence findings in the majority agree that waiting until January 2013 would be too late; that Iran will have already either made the bomb or will have gone beyond the point of no return to making one. Thus if like me you believe an Israeli strike is inevitable the question remains, when?
Politically, the best time for Israel to strike will be as soon as the Republican nominee is determined. This will hamper Obama from taking strong of an action against Israel. If he does, then the Republican nominee will clobber him over not supporting Israel. This is after all an election season and in an age where every demographic counts and every state is important, Obama cannot chance angering Jews in New York, Florida, Pennsylvania, Ohio and other states. If I were the guy posting the odds in Las Vegas on this I would give the best odds to June or July.
So what to do about all those rockets? Honestly, I’m a little less scared about that than in times past. Hezbollah’s last attack against Israel caused the destruction of a good portion of Lebanon for which they were blamed. However, then, they had Syria as back up along with Iran who were able to reinforce them through a supply chain that went through Syria. That option while still viable comes with many complications. Syria has internal problems of their own, the last thing the Assad regime needs now is fighting Israel while dealing with their own internal rebellion. This time when Israel threatens to return Lebanon to the Stone Age they won’t have to worry about Syria, or at least it will be a much weakened Syria.
Hamas in Gaza is still a problem but one that all military analysts believe is one the IDF can handle. Israel despite world condemnation in the past has been very soft on Hamas. A full scale war will force Israel to take the gloves off. They certainly will not care about U.N. condemnation if they respond to Hamas with force and the U.S., in this election season will have to have Israel’s back.
China and Russia seem to be protecting Syria and to a certain extent Iran. It is hard to imagine though that either one of them would be deeply upset about a nuclear setback in Iran. They also are perfectly happy to have the U.S. do all the fighting or taking all the hits from the fundamentalist Muslim countries. Finally, while the Arab Spring has given rise to the religious Muslim parties in Egypt, Libya and Tunisia I believe they are more concerned about bread and butter issues and will likely not be a factor. Let’s pray that all of Israel’s preparations will achieve similar results in Iran as did the strikes against Iraq and Syria when they crossed the nuclear line.