Splitting the Difference

Some years ago as a student at Yeshiva University a relative set me up with a great summer job. I was the "Judaic Specialist" at a JCC run Ranch Camp in Colorado. Besides leading services on Shabbat I was also in charge of overseeing the kashrut at the camp. Not being an expert on the latter subject I had a list of rabbis who I could call at anytime with any questions. One day a shipment of food was being delivered and there was meat delivered from a company I never heard of and wanted to check if it was ok. The rabbi I usually called, a modern Orthodox rabbi and alumnus of my university was on vacation, so I went to the next name on the list. The rabbi I spoke to was from the more ultra Orthodox wing and when I mentioned the name of the company he began to give me a whole Talmudic dissertation as to why some people do and some don't eat from this company. While it was a most interesting story it did not answer the question of whether or not I could use the meat. So I went to the next rabbi on the list, also from the more right of center crowd and got a similar non answer. The last name on the list was of a Hassidic Rebbe from a renown family who happened to be a distant relative of mine. When I called him with the same question he did not hesitate in answering me. What he said and how he said it has stuck with me through all these years and for those of you who know "Chassidishe Torah" his was a classic answer. "The meat is definitely not traif (non-kosher). Personally, I wouldn't eat it and I suspect knowing your family that your father wouldn't eat it either. As for the rest of the camp if there are others there that are very strict in observance, perhaps suggest they eat something else. As for being able to say it is kosher, it 100% is." The bottom line the Rebbe told me was that when he rents the camp for retreats or any other facility for that matter, he kashers (makes kosher) the kitchen anyway. 

The point he made struck me so deep. This Rebbe was telling me that basically the only standards he goes by are his own, therefore for those who don't live by his very strict standards the food was definitely kosher. I retell this story because I wonder why Judaism as a whole just doesn't live by this standard in all aspects of Jewish life. I speak more specifically to religious standards as they are set in Israel by the ever more conservative and narrow minded Chief Rabbinate. 

Let's start with acceptance of other denominations of Judaism. Non-Orthodox denominations at best get a quasi recognition by the government of Israel. Non Orthodox denominations in essence are treated as a foreign invention and not part of what was covered in an agreement made between Israel's first Prime Minister, David Ben-Gurion and the religious parties. I remind everyone that Conservative and Reform Judaism has been in existence much longer than the modern State of Israel. Granted those movements were late in jumping on the Zionist bandwagon, but let's be honest, the last time Jews ruled in Zion the main form of worship was animal sacrifice so even Orthodoxy is a "foreign invention." 

The problem is much deeper, because the Rabbinate which is 100% Orthodox also has complete hegemony over conversions, marriages, burial, holy sites, the Sabbath, kashrut and various other aspects of life in Israel. The monopoly they have on religious life runs counter to the Law of Return which guarantees anyone with one Jewish grandparent the right to be become an Israeli citizen as a Jew, or at least until they want to get married or need to be buried, then all bets are off on the individual's Judaism. 

Perhaps the biggest insult of all is the fact that many of these citizens are Jewish enough to fight and sometimes die for Israel as members of the armed forces, many if not most of these rabbinic edicts are made by rabbis who never went to the army and don't allow their followers to either. Those in Israel that prefer to be married by a rabbi they know rather than a complete stranger sent by the Rabbinate must leave the country to do so. Their foreign civil marriage is then recognized by the State. A Conservative Jew, who makes Aliyah, spends years in Israel, pays taxes, joins the army and does various other things on behalf of the State cannot have his wife eulogize him at his funeral because it goes against the Chief Rabbinate's rules. 

Women, cannot conduct prayer services in a Minyan or Quorum at any of Israel's many holy sites. Special accommodations are made usually at distance insulting to those who wish to exercise their spiritual needs. Even then heads are buried in the sand as extremists throw rocks, garbage and excrement at the women. And now, new modern regulations are being forced on all like segregated bus lines and modesty patrol in certain neighborhoods. 

What we need is more Chassidishe Torah, where all sides get to split the difference. This group eats here, this group marries this way, this group worships this way and so on. Perhaps we can call it self policing. I am very fortunate to be marrying off my oldest child, a daughter. The young man she is marrying comes from a Conservative household. When they decided to get married we agreed that the ceremony would be Orthodox, the stricter tradition that my family adheres to. In other words, we worked it out. We didn't need rabbinic police or policy makers to tell us what to do or what to agree to. When I go out to eat, it is my decision where I go. If by my standards this deli is kosher enough then I eat there, if it's not I don't. 

Many point to assimilation as a reason for the strict standards insisted upon in Israel. I don't see assimilation being the biggest problem in a country where Purim is a national holiday, but frankly I'm no expert. It really comes down to religious coercion and the refusal to cede power. I am beginning to find the Satmars who are outwardly anti-Zionist, to be the most intellectually honest of the ultra Orthodox. At least they admit that no religious standards set by the State of Israel means anything to them. 

To put it another way, I just want to know when Israel will grow up. Judaism is strictly a religion to some, but to most  of us it is a complex consortium of things; a nation, a people, a shared history, values, ethics, philosophy and yes a religion too. Judaism has a big enough tent to welcome all who see Judaism through different prisms. It always has. Of course there were split offs and different movements throughout history but that exists in every nation and certainly in every religion. Israel cannot be a nation to all its people if she allows a minority to rule over major aspects of the majority's needs. It can't work, it doesn't work and it won't last. The question now is how to change it with the least amount of bloodshed. 

My message to Haredi enforcers is the same one I have for extremist Islam and far right Fundamentalist Christians. There comes a time where if God is worried about something he doesn't need you to die or kill for him, He will handle it himself. I love Israel and am a proud Zionist, I believe that the time has come to accept ALL JEWS - FOR REAL. I can't map out the process to changing but I can urge for the change to come - so can you. Chag Kasher V'sameach